Maybe it’s just that I don’t see the point in talking over other people.
I’ve been struggling quite a bit with getting across my points in group discussion on the topics that I really, really, down to the bottom of my heart give two fucks about.
During summer, my first week back, my family was annoyed with just how ‘loud’ I had gotten.
I was more vocal. I had a bloody voice that I may or may not have abused to an extent that would not have been acceptable by Malaysian standards.
I do not mean to discount Malaysian levels of what is considered an appropriate tone to use in conversations. Nor do I believe that the American standard of being vocal is any less of a ‘standard’.
I want to do as the Romans do, really. It’s easier that way, isn’t it?
Maybe it is my insecurities too that get in my way. Maybe that is why I may come off as another passive yellow person in class (which is a horrible stereotype to believe and enforce subconsciously).
Bottom point is, in what way should you approach ‘having a voice’?
How do you get it out there?
I contradict myself.
On one hand, I have very strong opinions. On the other hand, my voice does not convey that. My skin colour doesn’t convey that either.
So what does? How do I get you to understand without you disregarding my opinions and sweeping them past by because my accent differs from yours?
I’ll listen to my daddy of course.
‘Accept the guai lous for who and what they represent.’
Accept, dear self. Accept, Jen. Accept.